We all know the saying “People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones”. I think this best describes a person with a personality disorder. It becomes a disorder when their own thoughts and actions negatively effect their lives and the lives of the people around them. This is because their thoughts are disordered. Disordered for who? Disordered for them and the outcomes they wish to achieve. In short if a person wants their glass house knocked down and they sit out the front throwing stones at everyone that comes by until someone throws a stone back and their glass house is knocked down. Well their thoughts are not disordered as their actions resulted in what they hoped to achieve. However if someone who doesn’t want their glass house knocked down does the same action and gets the same result, this is a disorder of their thoughts. Because the result of their actions was not what they wanted to achieve.
I remembered as a young child growing up when I had a falling out with a sibling Dad did this thing to teach me the importance of family. Dad handed me a paddle pop stick and ask me to break it and I did. As I was one of eight children he then stacked eight paddle pop sticks on top of each other and asked me to break them, I could not. Then he explained that if us eight kids stick together no one can break us, that there was nothing more important than us all sticking together. The lesson was drummed in to me and as an autistic child I took these words literally for life. Dad also drummed into us that we are Elson’s and we are better than everyone. And as a family we felt that way. I now realise that is nothing more than Narcissistic personality disorder, they believe they are better than everyone else.
When Mums first email about assets ended with ” You have a choose to make weather you want to live in harmony with you family” it was the worst case scenario for me. I tried to contact my siblings to tell them what I was going through and they all refused to give me their email addresses, all at the same time. Stating I would use their emails to defame Mum and Dad. It was too late they had already drove a wedge between me and my siblings. I felt the pain that my older brother had gone through and I understood why he could never forgive Mum and Dad. They had taken away the most important thing in my life and for what? A dispute over assets, money. Without the support of councilors, psychiatrist and NDIS I am not sure how I would of got through this.
Mum and Dad had been down this road before with my elder brother and they followed the same pattern. First stop me from coming to the family home. Contact police and report a false occurrence of aggressive and malicious behavior so as to stop me attending the property. Convince my siblings I am dangerous and not to contact me. Ring my friends with more lies saying police have said I am dangerous and to stay away from me. Of course tell everyone “I am out to get them”, this puts doubt on anything I say before I even get a chance to say it. This is all about controlling the situation using FEAR the number one tool of Narcsisst and Sociopath. Without any concern for how this was effecting my siblings and their families. Mum and Dad dragged them into this situation with false fear well before I had considered doing this page.
Sociopaths and Narcissist’s have no empathy and only think of self preservation. They engage in reckless and illegal activity because they think they are special and above the LAW of common people.
For me the assets were an investment for my future and as I was unable to work now I needed payment for what I owned. Their response was pretty extreme over a measly amount of money that I was willing to let them pay off. Or was it over a measly amount of money?
After so many failed efforts to resolve this between ourselves I did as they insisted and engaged a solicitor to take the matter to court. After discussions about the family house transferring from a trust to their personal names the solicitor obtained a copy of the trust. Would you believe it, more lies. The family home is still in the names of all eight siblings and they are just the trustees. It gets worse, the trust vested 22 years ago and the property was to be handed over to all eight siblings then. As trustee’s they are legally bound to follow the trust deed as set out.
Details of Trust
TRUE MOTIVE
Now the picture is becoming clear. It has all been about stopping me entering the property because it is legally my property. I have the right to have them removed by police if I am on the property. They needed to have my siblings and friends believe I was dangerous to stop me coming to the property. They instilled false fear into every ones lives just to protect their own life style. Same as they had done to my brother 20 years ago. They did the worst thing they could ever do to me, come between my siblings and me.
How can they not realise that eventually this was always going to come out? Because they believe they are special and above the law. Reckless illegal behavior. To Mum and Dad the law is just another tool they can use to their advantage when needed, but completely disregard if it effects them negatively in any way. There is three mortgages against the property. If anyone thinks this is about money I don’t think that there will be much money with three mortgages and 8 owners. This is about the truth and what their dirty lies and secrets have done to this family.
Psychiatrist liken growing up in a family like this to a cult. You must worship the leader and if you go against him/her you are out. When you grow up you go one of two ways. You become that same leader believing that you know everything, control everything and your children must not go against you either. Or you enter the world with no boundaries because you were never allowed to have any. You believe love comes with control so you look for that in a partner. The cycle continues either way resulting in broken families and trauma for the children involved.
The facts are a quarter of the 8 siblings have been diagnosed with mental conditions, where has it come from? Either it is genetic or it is the environment we were raised in, most likely both. Either way it has come from Mum and Dad. Four out of the 7 married siblings have had a breakdown of their marriage leading to divorce. This is a cycle that is destined to continue if this family just keeps sticking it’s head in the sand. There is a solution, acceptance and education. Learn, you will be happier for it. Teach your children through example so they can teach their children. They will all be happier for it and isn’t that what everyone wants for their family.
For those who are thinking “How could I do this”. I am not going to pretend it has been an easy decision. But Mum and Dad have set the rules here. They involved the police and now they are facing fraud charges. They have insisted on going to court and now a judge will not only make a decision on these assets but all their assets.
I have spoken the truth about what Mum and Dad have done to me, and what they have done in their lives. I have gone as far as I have had to go to set healthy boundary for me, to show them I will no longer put up with any abuse from them ever again. All I wanted was what I have paid for and to get some distance from them. Mum and Dad have taken my assets. They tried to manipulate me into giving them my assets. They kick me off the property which they had no lawful right to do. They told lies about me to my family, friends and police. They refused every attempt to resolve this through mediation and stopped all contact. They insisted on going through solicitors and court action. This has cost me personally more than any amount of money will ever make up for.
Remember the story about people in glass houses? Any person with their thoughts in the right order, who was living in a property owned by someone else would seek to resolve any issues with that person as quick and as hassle free as they could. Mum and Dad chose to throw stones as hard as they could. This is their problem, they created this toxic situation. They have pushed to take the matter to court in an attempt to burry me in cost they know I can not afford. I have just found a way to do it at their expense.
Mum and Dads behavior is typical of a personality disorder, their thoughts and actions have brought about the very thing they were trying to avoid. Impacting negatively on their life’s and the life’s of everyone around them. Mum and Dad are responsible for the things they have done in their lives no one else. Now it is no longer up to me to decide right and wrong it is up to the court, as is the consequences for their actions.